has life made intimacy & sex in your life go stale?

As boudoir photographer, once people get into the swing of their photoshoot and relax varies topics come up. For a few hours I become one of your friends and the session becomes the relaxing glass of wine.

This means I’ve heard lots of tips on having a good sex life from both individuals and especially from couples. I thought it would be fun to share some of the top 6 that i’ve heard many times and could help you.

Schedule Sex: I know how unromantic that sounds but I can’t tell you how many times i’ve heard couples say that between work, kids and day to day life they simply forget to have sex. Or it begins to feel so unimportant that they can push off to another day or month. I’ve heard many clients with vibrant sex lives say that they understand it’s not just another task it’s reconnection of their relationship. Even if it’s just a quickie, it can help maintain that intimacy
Spend Quality Time: Do something together other than TV time. I know it’s the easiest thing to do after the kids go to bed, but your attention is on the TV not on each other. Sometimes it looks like having a cup of tea and talking about your week but there is real value to focusing on each other. Your intimacy grew out of that attention to each other, it will only stay alive that way. Believe it or not this actually helps in the bedroom too.
Communication: Communicate your desires and needs. I hear this one all the time, I’ve had not only clients but those people around me complain about sex or their partner not doing something romantic for them. But when I ask if they have spoken to them about it, they haven't! They just assume that their partner should magically know or they are just too embarrassed to bring it up. The ones who praise all the things their partner does for them in and out of the bed all have one thing in common. COMMUNICATION. They sat down with their partner or at some point made it clear what they would like (hints don't count). Our partners aren’t mind readers and they aren’t us, they don’t think like us. Remember that.
Help out: Helping out on tasks that aren’t normally yours. Helping your partner out with those day to day chores, that are normally the others job. If you have a million things to do, having someone take a few of those things off your plate (without being badgered) actually frees up your mind to think of other things like your partner. Which can lead to REALLY thinking about your partner!
Casual non-sexual touch. Many partners don’t realize that non-sexual touch can turn into great sex but it can. Here is another thing I hear alot, “They only touch me when they want sex”. Most partners don’t realize that when all of their touches are associated with that one thing then it’s actually a frustration and a turn off. When you first got together light arm touches, cuddles, hugs and hand holding didn’t have to mean sex. It meant I really enjoy being near you, which meant intimacy. If you are having this problem, communicate with them about it. If touches can mean more than just sex again you’ll be more keen to the ones that eventually lead to it.
Be Patient: When you have the time, wait till both of you are really ready. Plenty of times one tries to rush into the main course without really making sure their partner is ready. Foreplay is a huge thing for a reason! If you slow down and savor the experience then you’ll both find the end destination much more pleasurable.